Your kids want your attention but all you can think about is how many hours until bedtime. You want to engage with them, ask them about their day and lay on the floor to play with them, but the never ending to-do list holds you back, telling them 'just give me 5 more minutes'.
You're exhausted and overwhelmed, short tempered with your partner. You want to reconnect with them but you're too exhausted to engage in anything more than a meaningless social media scroll at the end of the day.
You had your eye on joining a class and getting together with friends but it all sounds like more energy than you can muster.
You thought motherhood would be easier, but then you just assume it must just be you that finds it so hard. Maybe you're doing something wrong? Maybe this is just the cost of motherhood?!
When is the last time you laughed? Like full on belly-laughed? When is the last time you felt excited about something? When is the last time you did something just for you, not because it checked off something on your checklist but because YOU wanted to? My goodness, when is the last time you just sat in peace to relish in a simple moment with a hot coffee?!
Everyone says it is the cost of motherhood but you didn't expect it to be so easy and yet so painful to lose yourself along the way.
The epitomy of motherhood is NOT to lose oneself completely, yet here you are, continuously sacrificing and losing yourself along the way. Motherhood requires sacrifice, absolutely, but it cannot be done to the detriment of who you are.
It's not laziness or a lack of will power and it definitely does not need to be the 'cost of motherhood'. It is BURNOUT.
You need to start showing up for yourself because the stressors are never going to go away, but your ability to show up for your own life will! And I'm going to be honest with you, while I do love a good massage, pedicure and glass of wine, the burnout runs so much deeper than that.
What if you actually showed up for yourself? Not after everything and everyone else was attended to but instead, you actually put yourself on your own list?
What if instead of blaming yourself for not being able to do more, you found ease to get more done while doing less?
What if you let go of the story that to be a good mother or woman means you have to lose yourself completely, put everyone else first and be content with the scraps?
It's not about doing more, because let's be real, no woman on this earth has time for more! It's about showing up AS YOU ARE instead of as the woman you have been told to be! Because guess what, the woman you have been told to be is likely one that is required to do more with less support, and to become a fraction of herself along the way. Shine bright but not too bright, be helpful, be quiet, always put others first and if you really must take care of yourself then make sure it's contained to a 60minute pedicure.
I realized awhile ago that I cannot raise my two amazing daughters to be brave, audacious, adventurous, curious, and inspiring human beings that are daring enough to change this world, if I show up as less than I am.
I am their example. But more than that, I am a woman that deserves to live my one true beautiful life and I cannot do that when I am in burnout. I cannot inspire change and experience adventure when I am in overwhelm. And I refuse to live my life in constant overwhelm, frustration and stress. I want adventure and energy. I want to be excited and feel confident whether I'm navigating the grocery store or the many million random whirlwinds that come my way!
I know, you think you don't have time because the schedule is completely full of kids routines, practices, and commuting. But that is why you need this course. You need to start being a part of your own day. You are encouraging everyone else to experience life to the fullest while simultaneously disappearing from your own.
I know you think you don't have the money, but the thing is, you keep filling your online shopping cart full of items that promise a reprieve, happiness, contentment or some magic solution to why the heck this feels so hard, but the reprieve never lasts.
I know you feel shame at admitting you are not doing ok. Like you are somehow doing it wrong. But you're not doing it wrong and you're not broken. You are brave. You are being asked to complete an impossible job, with limited to no support, in a world that asks you to disappear in acts of 'self-lessness'. Asking for help and wanting to show up for your life is the bravest thing you can do for yourself and your family.
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